Famous Pizza Dip

I am starting to be concerned about my nutrition. A sample of my meals this week: Monday night, order pizza because I am behind on my blog entries. Tuesday breakfast: cold pizza leftovers. Tuesday lunch: eat McDonalds, because I cannot face my kitchen again. Weds lunch: Freezer pizza, (see previous reasons). Weds dinner: Pizza Dip recipe.

This is what the cat thinks of my recipe book project.

SO. Today's recipe, Famous Pizza Dip, was provided by an old high school friend of mine and his fabulous wife. The Howletts' Famous Pizza Dip is pretty easy and straightforward, save for the fact that it involves a mystery ingredient called 'Pizza Quick', which they claim is pizza topping sauce. I claim it is a figment of their imagination. I claim this because it was not at the (albeit ghetto) grocery store, nor is it particularly findable on the internet--as Josh will attest to after I informed him he would be procuring it after my failure. He ultimately called his mother, a nutritionist, to ask for possible substitute ideas, and came home with a can of tomato sauce and a can of tomato paste and told me to hope for the best.

This seemed reasonable. As it turns out, it may not have been. I went for just the tomato sauce, sans paste, and the result was basically watery tomato juice in between two giant cases of cheese. Not exactly very scoopable. Also, I think I overcooked it, so the top was a little too hard to break, like a particularly defiant yet edible tire.

Regardless, Josh and I soldiered on and tried to eat it. We got the picture that if we found this mythical Pizza Quick (or appropriate substitute), and perhaps I didn't bake it within an inch of its life, it would taste very very addictively good.

Meanwhile, I basically wound up eating a bowl of cheese and Fritos for dinner. This cannot be good for me. Especially considering the next recipe is, again, another dip. I am going to die.

The picture of health

Famous Pizza Dip

1 large tray
2 sticks of cream cheese
2 bags of mozzarella cheese (shredded)
1 jar of Pizza Quick (or, in my case, a paltry failed substitute)
2 bags of Frito's scoops chips

Enjoy the fact that the recipe calls for '1 bag', when I think in theory the bags can be different sizes. But take comfort in knowing this means the recipe will be harder to fuck up. Or so you think.

Heat up cream cheese so it can be spread along the bottom of your large tray. Spread Pizza Quick (hahahahahahahaha) over the cream cheese. Sprinkle shreeded mozzarella cheese over that.

Voila - heat on 450 for 20 minutes! Use your Frito's to dip! While you are waiting for it to heat up, get out the defibrolator to revive yourself with after you eat an entire dish of it for dinner!