In fact, I imagined giant cooked shrimp sitting in a sea of white creamy dip and thought, 'BLURGH.' However, the recipe was in the book. Not only that, but it was provided by Shauna and Rob, and Shauna has a bit of the domestic goddess about her. I decided to be optimistic. In fact, I saw that the recipe also called for cocktail sauce and I thought, "Oh, well, you didn't say anything about the delight that is cocktail sauce. Now you are indeed talking.' Sometimes I think in sentences that sound like a fussy Victorian who is just learning English.
This was another instance of having to go to multiple groceries for just a few ingredients. It seems the fancy pants expensive grocery near me is too cool to have canned shrimp. It had, like, 75 rows of canned everything else, but evidently thought that canned shrimp was just too gauche for words. So I went to the trusty ghetto grocery, which has about 4 items total and indeed one of them was canned shrimp. This goes to show you that I have no idea where to expect to find anything.
The recipe was very easy and simple and fast. It didn't even involve baking; just slop all the things into the dish (attractively, of course) and you're done. It did, however, involve yet another goddamn block of softened cream cheese. In case you are counting, this is the third softened block of cream cheese I have cooked with inside of a week. I think I can actually feel the cellulite forming as I type this.
Unfortunately, my original instincts on this one proved (I'm sorry Shauna and Rob! Gah!) correct. I'm sure if you are a Shrimp-Dip-type-person, then this must be the very pinnacle of the Shrimp Dip form. I, however, am not that type of person. I am a shrimp purist, if you will. To me, Shrimp + cheeses + sour cream + mayo + cocktail sauce = unholy. Perhaps I am being slightly dramatic. It was actually all right, but somehow the cocktail sauce--the very item that I thought would make it good--was screaming at me while I ate it. What it was screaming was, 'Why the fuck are you eating me with cream cheese?!'
Predictably, Josh liked it. Once again, in case you are counting, so far the tally is recipes made: 8. Recipes that Josh liked: 8. Josh's blessing on a recipe is now as special as breathing. If Josh comes to your house and compliments you on the meal you make, you should feel like Josh has said something with the emotional power of, 'Where is the bathroom?' Of course, his retort is just that I am a picky eater. Perhaps he is just delighted that I am cooking all the time and he knows how to keep a good thing going, and that means eating the shrimp dip.
A horror or a masterpiece? You be the judge.Shrimp Dip
1 block of cream cheese - softened (now obviously the mainstay of my diet)
8 oz of sour cream
1/4 cup mayonnaise
3-4 tsp of crushed garlic (i.e., about 1 bulb, i.e., enough garlic to make your hands still stink of it the next morning)
2 cans of Geisha baby shrimp - drained & rinsed (Ghetto grocery only had Starkist brand. Does this make me a renegade?)
1 jar of cocktail sauce (read: one wee deli tub of fancy high-end grocery brand cocktail sauce)
2 cups shreeded mozzarella cheese
Combine first four ingredients well and spread in bottom of pie plate. Enjoy knowing just how long you must microwave the cream cheese to soften it, since this is what you do now. Enjoy getting to use another pie plate that has previously languished, unloved, in its drawer. Enjoy using garlic crusher until better part of kitchen/sink/hands are covered in sticky garlic stink.
Ask Josh to rinse shrimp. Spread baby shrimp over first layer. Recall the first time you ever ate baby shrimp, on a Caesar salad you got from room service on a family trip to Hilton Head when you were 8. Damn, that was a good salad.
Ask Josh to make phone call to secure Thurs night plans. Be thankful he is so agreeable. Spread cocktail sauce over shrimp.
Cover with mozzarella cheese. Think, 'Jesus God this was fast.'
Refrigerate until ready to serve, which is to say, do not refrigerate at all.
Possible garnish: chopped red & green peppers (blech) and/or chopped scallions (yum) on top.
Serve with tortilla chips. Tostitos Scoops work well. Or else dig out all the old bags of unfinished tortilla chips from the cabinet and tell Josh to pick the least stale one and go for it.
Okay, so perhaps that isn't exactly a culinary masterpiece but people do like it at parties... I'm actually kind of surprised that this is the recipe that I submitted given that I'm not especially in love with it. Can I resubmit? I'd like a second chance at recipe glory!
ReplyDeleteUndeterred by Heather's warnings of 'oh, you don't really have to eat that, there's spinach dip instead,' I got both dips out on the counter, took one chip-full of the spinach dip, and went back to work on the shrimp dip. So there you go, I like the shrimp dip. But I didn't taste any shrimp. Pretty much cream cheese.
ReplyDeleteCream cheese, sour cream, AND mayo? That's gotta be Midwest.
ReplyDeleteYou are neither the first person to make that wager, nor the first to be wrong. It's Boston, baby, all the way.
ReplyDelete